This blog is officially "retired," but my other blog,
"The Lair of the Silver Fox," is still open for business!

Sunday, December 21, 2008

Hang-Ups, the Sequel!

If you haven't already, please read my previous post, Hang-Ups. I'll still be here when you get back. I promise.

This (Sunday) afternoon, I called my mother and -- wouldn't you know it! -- accidentally disconnected the call. I called her back and explained what had happened, and told her that after our new call was through, I was going to smash that offensive telephone. She said "No, you're not," and I explained to her that, Yes, I was, and it was okay because I had other telephones which I could use. Wouldn't you know it, during this second call, I hung up accidentally a second time!

At that point, I did exactly what you'd expect someone whose blog is named "David'Z RantZ" to do... Namely, I whacked that $7.00 plastic and metal sonofabitch against the wall repeatedly until it broke into pieces.

"Anger management?"

I think not.

Sometimes it's good to let it out of your system, like the steam valve on a pressure cooker.

Frankly... I feel much better now.

Thanks for your time.


  1. It's a good thing your Mom didn't hang-up on you.

  2. BACON ACE: What, you have something against the Barack "I don't think my ears would fit [on Mt. Rushmore]" Obama look?

    (Speaking of Mt. Rushmore, have you ever met one of those people who think it's a natural rock formation? I know it was a joke in the movie "My Fellow Americans," but there really are people who think like that!)

    IANO: I called my Mom (on my spare telephone) and told her about these comments. I got the impression she plans to be nicer to me in general. Just in case. (She's 91, so her former self-defense skills have pretty much fallen by the wayside.)

  3. Someone told me that you get what you pay for. Most people would just chalk this up to a poor buying decision. I have a phone that's lasted for about 7 years. I think I paid $20 for it. You may want to spend the extra $13. It may make you less Rantzy.

  4. ugh that would drive me insane! I would curse the phone everytime it hung up on someone...unless it was someone I didn't feel like talking to then I'd be like ooh sorry then make it happen again and then they would be too frustrated to call back!

  5. Sarah: Or you could do the "smashing" thing while you're still talking to the other person, so they'd think you were a total lunatic and not want to call you again...

    Maverick Larry: Hm. Valid point. Yeah, I generally tend to agree with the "you get what you pay for" theory, although in this specific case, I take issue with any design that puts the disconnect button right next to the earpiece, at any price. But for a totally different example? I once had to ask a girlfriend of mine -- politely! -- to stop using my money to buy manual can openers at the Dollar Tree. She'd rinse one $1 opener off, and it'd be 90% rust the next day. She'd buy another $1 opener, and it wouldn't open more than one can... ever! She'd buy a third $1 opener, and it would literally bend into an unusual shape during use. I finally said, "For what I've spent on all of these, we could have bought one good one." So again, you've made a valid point.

    Oh, what the hell, I spent $7 and got two posts out of it. I guess it paid for itself along the way, after all.

  6. I can't decide which comment is funnier...but I think I know which one is in the lead.

    It's [comment disconnects]

  7. My mother laughed harder at IANO's. Of course, she is 91...

    WTF are you doing up this late? {looks at clock} Oh. Damn. Not as late as I thought it was. Feels like 2 a.m.

  8. IANO's was the one I laughed hardest at, too.

    ...wait, does that make me a 91 year old woman!?

    I'm up too late...I was tired earlier and now I'm procrastinating about going to bed. It's warm in this blanket on the couch with the tv on...the walk to the bedroom seems long and cold.

    Stupid winter.

  9. Aren't the insides cooooooool looking?

  10. Oh, good, another insomniac!

    What I can find so far, yeah.

  11. Yeah. This is the only time I get to myself... what's YOUR excuse? snort!!

  12. I'm usually up latelatelate. Sometimes I go to sleep well after dawn. (And that's when I'm alone, and sober.)

  13. David,
    I didn't know this was the "Amuse my 91 year old Mom with a Comment contest." goes:
    During WW2 how many crappy telephones did it take to click) ...stupid, poorly designed phones....

  14. Hey, with a temperamental son like me, my mother needs all the comedy relief she can get!

  15. Namely, I whacked that $7.00 plastic and metal sonofabitch against the wall repeatedly until it broke into pieces.


  16. Hahaha Do you know how many cordless phones have died untimely and painful deaths at my hands? :)


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